I've been a bad bad girl.

      I've always been hard on myself, and especially after the holidays I get onto myself a lot.  This year though I deff deserve it.  I was doing so well with eating right and drinking the right things.  I veered off when I was too proud to pay $4 for a bottle of water, or $3 for a cup of water, and I gave in to the $2 soda.  I started a downward spiral that has come to me landing in bed for the past 2 days in so much pain.  The odd thing was that when we were out at TGIFridays I ordered water.  It shows that I KNOW BETTER, but I just wanted to splurge. 

     It started when we were at Dollywood last week.  OMG It was so much fun to go out with my family to an amusement park for the holidays.  We had so much fun.  Even walking the strip in Gatlinburg was fun.  I was feeling fine Monday when we got back.  Christmas on Tuesday I cooked IC friendly, but I didn't drink IC Friendly.  Yesterday 5 days of drinking like crap caught up to me.  Well, Tuesday night/Wed morning.  I didn't sleep the past 2 nights because I was in so much pain and having to get up to use the ladies room so much.  I did it to myself though, so I am fully to blame.  Today I vowed to use the Christmas gift my MIL got me (a juicer) and start drinking more blueberry juice and homemade apple juice again.  I splurged and it got the best of me.  Other than that I only really veered off the diet when I had pizza, but it was so thin there was almost 0 sauce on it.  It felt good to eat it just once though (and that is really all I did eat it).  

     While I was lying around most of the day yesterday (I did get out to visit my sister who delivered my newest nephew yesterday) I was reading some books trying to catch up on some sleep I didn't get the night prior.  Only problem with that is I had the same issue during the day.  I had to pee.  So, I learned a valuable lesson......STICK TO THE DIET AND DONT DRINK SODA!!!!!

     Christmas was fun though.  Having the weekend with just my little family in Gatlinburg (Smokey Mountain Christmas baby) was nice.  We relaxed and enjoyed the time we had together. I cooked a big meal for 10 people on Christmas.  That kept me on my feet from 0830-10pm.  It was worth it though.  I enjoyed having both my parents and Dennis's parents along with my grandma and other family members stop by.  It made it really feel like a family holiday.  I also enjoyed not having to drive all over Clarksville.  Dennis did ask me if I want to take a break next year and let someone else do it, but I can see the driving and dividing time between everyone starting up again.  I really like having it where I don't have to drive and schedule so much.  It's nice and relaxing.  Everyone comes to us.  Sounds selfish, but driving 5 places isn't fun on Christmas.

     Well, I hope you all take a lesson from me and follow your diet.  The docs tell us this not to be mean, but for our own good.  Now, today starts day 1 all over again of being coke free.  I made it 5wks last time....I'm shooting for 8 this time.

SO SORRY!!!!

      Forgive me for it being so long since I last wrote.  I've been super busy.  Between Physical Therapy, Scouts, Family, oh and um ICE it has been a crazy few weeks.

     I'm nearing the end of week 4 with NO SODA.  On (of all days) Friday the 13th I will have officially gone 4wks no soda, tea, coffee, or kool aid.  That is a big deal for me, so I'm happy.  I have moved past the needing it stage, and have learned other things I can drink.  I really am big on water, water, water, oh and blueberry juice. Apple is good here and there, but not in large quantities.  

     I have cheated, and I learned a few things I cannot have.  Chocolate cake being one of them.  Spicy foods are another.  I also had pizza last night (no sauce but I had pepperoni) and its either been the spicy pepperoni or the chocolate cake from my sister's baby shower, but I am in the midst of a flare up.  Has not stopped me from having a life though.

     Thanksgiving was good.  OH was it GOOD.  I made an IC friendly Thanksgiving and it was so simple.  You could not really tell the difference (minus the missing cranberry sauce).  Even the pumpkin pie was IC friendly and nobody could tell.  It was enjoyable!!!!

     I'm excited to share that if all goes as planned, and my grades stay steady (I've got a 3.95 GPA currently) I will be graduating in October!!!!  I can't believe I have essentially entered my senior year. Granted I'm taking 24 credits a semester vs the normal 12 of the other students, but I think I can handle it. If I don't then I will graduate in May 2014.  Yeah a bit of a difference, but hey think positive right!!!

     Now, I started this to tell you all that you CAN live with IC.  So, some proof that you can....lol.  Hubby and I have had a few date nights including most of yesterday (yes in a flare up).  We went Christmas shopping in Nashville, went to see the Trans-Siberian Orchestra, and even walked around Opryland Hotel seeing their beautiful lights.  As a family we have done so much.  We are almost always on the go.  They really do keep me going.  In fact I've got an interview on Wednesday for a job.  

     YES, I DO plan on going to work.  I DO NOT want to be one to sit down and do nothing.  I want to show that with hard work and determination you do not have to be stuck in the house doing nothing.  Yes, I do have flare ups.  In fact I feel like I'm taking 50 trips a day to the bathroom (and like 7 at night).  I am working on getting those down with bladder training.  I'm confident that I will be able to work and be alright!

    Well, I need to go and get ready to pick up kiddos.  I figured though I will leave you with a quick view of some of our Christmas photos.

 

6 Days Heck Yeah!!!!

     Sorry for such a bleh heading but, its been 6 days w/o coffee/coke/tea/koolaid.  I have never made it that long at all!!!!  GO ME!!!!

    Yesterday I actually had a great day till just prior to bed time.  It was good to get up in front of a few of my girls and do a team meeting, I sat on unpadded seats and was ok getting a makeover, and I did not give into temptation for Taco Bell (stupid victory huh).  I think the bed time pain was just from doing so much during the day (I had a busy DAY not just night).  Overall amazing day though.

     Today was physical therapy.  I won't lie.  It was one of those days that I just did not want to get out of bed.  It was more just exhausted.  I did have a little bit of pain this morning, but nothing horrible.  After my 1.5hr drive to Physical therapy I felt much better.  I had pelvic floor stretching (that was odd) and heat therapy.  The heat therapy was great...omg I loved it.  I even was relaxed enough to go out to eat with the hubby and his co-workers.  It was nice.  I even stayed on diet, turned down free pie, and did not have anything but water to drink..go me.  The rest of the day was just relaxing and enjoying movies with hubs.  

     Speaking of time with hubby, Saturday is DATE NIGHT!!!!  I am so excited...Hunger Games (yes, Im a geek.)  He is spoiling me with the movie.  Then Sunday he gave in to doing family photos. HECK YEAH.  Last year we got Christmas pics taken, but we never saw them.  So, I'm excited.  :)  

     Well, I've bored you all long enough.  Have a great night everyone!!!

Crazy Few Days

     Man, has it been a crazy few days.  Friday night was a Den meeting.  So many people there who know that I'm going through things (though not knowing what) were so supportive and encouraging.  I found it to be extremely helpful and uplifting.  Saturday was my first day out and about for a full day since my surgery.  I have to say I survived pretty well.  Sore (again surgery caused), but did well.  I even avoided the falling asleep early thing.  Since starting the Elmiron I've been extremely tired.  Most days I can avoid the urge to fall asleep early though.  Saturday I kept busy with putting up our Christmas tree....oh it was so much fun!!!!  Sunday, well...that is another story.  I woke up at 8am, and was back asleep by 9.  I ended up sleeping in till 11.  OMG I won't lie...it felt good to sleep in. I know it's not realistic though to expect every day.  Still felt good.  I ended up though feeling out of it though.  One of the days where I was in pain (and running a fever), and I do believe that is why I slept in.  I did end up getting up to go get my meds and such from the pharmacy.  My favorite part of Sunday...I PUT ON JEANS!!!!  I know it seems like such a small thing, but my swelling from the surgery went down enough I was able to put on jeans and walk around comfortably for the first time in 1.5wks.  I can't believe how much I rely on my jeans....lol.  Today, well that was a take the kids to the doctor and pharmacy day, and then write a paper for school...just a boring day!!!  Tomorrow is going to be busy though w/ getting prepped for a meeting at my house for my PR Girls.  I feel like I'm rocking it out so far!!!

     Eating IC safe foods is not near as bad, so far, as I thought it originally would be.  I told you all of the recipe site I found the other day.  I saw on her site, and others, pesto mentioned.  I have NEVER had pesto prior to saturday night.  OMG I LOVE IT.  I don't know how I lived without it.  I have always been horrible about being open to trying new things, but a few months ago I opened up to FRESH spinach, and now I advanced it into pesto.  I am more and more accepting of this lately.  It's been 4 full days of NO coffee, coke, koolaid, or tea.  That is HUGE for me.  I am such an addict to my caffeine, so it feels so good to have made it 4 days.  Though I will say I've gone through almost an entire gallon of milk in 3 days.  Now, for confession.  I've found it easier to give up my drinks than to give up chocolate. I have been sneaking bits of chocolate here and there.  It has been fewer than normal.  I'm at a point in the month where I normally would be drowning in chocolate, but I've had 1 small nugget today.  I'm proud of myself for just doing that.  I know that I will get to the point where I can wean myself off all chocolate though, and I will work toward that.  For now though I'm living up my victory of 4 days w/o coke, coffee, and sweet drinks.  GO ME!!!

     Well, you all enjoy your day.  I'm thinking 10:30 is a good time to crash...lol.  PSSST...if you are a bargain shopper this week Walgreens has Purex laundry detergent buy 1 get 2 free!!!!  Just thought I would throw that out there...lol. NIGHT

Day 1 of IC Diet

     Today is day 1 of the IC diet for me.  I'm on the elimination portion.  I won't fib this has been hard and it's only 10am...LOL.  I'm a foodie.  I like food...LOL.  I'm searching Pinterest for new breakfast foods now.  I've gotten dinner planned out for the family (yum...they get roast).  For me I'm thinking carrots at lunch and fresh spinach and carrots at dinner w/ a glass of water.  I know this only lasts a few weeks so that is a plus.  I also know that it is only hard because I'm over thinking it.  I WILL get the hang of it and it WILL be easier.

     I think I slept wrong last night because I'm having some pain, but it's not IC pain.  This is surgical site pain.  I'm hoping it hits the road soon because I've got 10 scouts who are counting on me tonight.  We are working on a skit for next week's pack meeting.  I hope they enjoy doing it!

     Ok well I think that is it for now.  I felt the need to blog for some random reason...lol.  Have a great day.

~Update~

     I found out that of the things around the house I can actually eat one of my favorite foods...peanut butter!!!!  So, that along with my whole wheat bread I was able to have something other than just carrots for lunch...lol.  I am excited about that.  Oh and then while "Pinning" on Pinterest I found nICeats.blogspot.com.  She has an entire website of foods that are IC safe.  Once I'm out of the elimination portion I do plan on trying some of her ideas!!!!

   I do want to know if anyone else on Elmiron has extreme fatigue?  I'm really tired, and w/o my coffee (yes didn't that suck at first to give up...lol) I feel like I'm dragging.  I know eventually my body will jut the addiction it has to caffeine.  I can say though I'm excited at that thought.  The thought of NOT being ran by something like that is YAY!!!!


     Now, off to stalk Pinterest some more for more foods...lol.

Newly Diagnosed

      Welcome to my blog.  Last week I was diagnosed as having interstitial cystitis or IC.  Upon my research of the past week I have found so many different blogs/chats/boards that show how horrible IC is.  I even had people telling me to keep up with everything so I could file for disability now and get my handicap parking quickly.  I was beginning to get down about it all.  Then today I met with my Physical Therapist.  She changed my way of thinking.  She reminded me that I'm going to have good days, bad days, and in-between days.  She said "Don't believe everything you read."  I realized she was right.  Then at lunch with a friend of mine who has another disease that can be very debilitating she mentioned that she wanted to put a blog together for her good days. I will give her complete credit for this idea.  I never would have really considered making it public if it had not been for that.  I decided that it would be good for other people to see the journey from the start for someone and follow along.  While I do not know what is ahead of me I do know that I'm not one to let this control me any longer.  So welcome to my journey.

     I guess now it would be good to tell you how it all got started and a little about me.  My name is Lillian, but everyone just calls me Lilly.  I'm a 29yr old female, married to the love of my life Dennis for 10years, and I have 2 boys who are elementary age.  I will be the first to admit I'm not a small woman.  I was 95lbs when I got married, but unfortunately I let myself go. Nobody is to blame but me for that.  My goal is to get down to a healthy weight again, but that is going to come with time and hard work.  I am also a full time student with Ashford University (woohoo Criminal Justice major), Cub Scout Den Leader, and a Director with Pure Romance (Proud of this, but it also has something to do with my story).  

  ME

     Like I mentioned prior, I got diagnosed last week. It pretty much all started early this year.  I was in bits of pain here and there, but blew it off as PMS.  Then in June I landed myself in the ER.  The pain I was in was crazy.  I thought it was my appendix.  The hospital told me it sounded like it was early onset of appendix issues and I needed to see my PCM.  The problem with that is my PCM would not get me in till AUGUST (yes you read that right...2month wait).  So, 2 nights later I end up in the ER at another hospital.  They told me it was not my appendix and it was return of my endometriosis (pain during intimacy, around my menstrual cycle, and other times).  After a long wait (2months) to get to my PCM he gives me the referral to the OBGYN in his group telling me that I'll likely have a hysterectomy.  I went to Pure Romance World Conference and Patty Brisben (our founder) was shocked when I mentioned it (IDK why I did...lol) and said "I hope you have a really good doctor."  At the time I was on Tricare and had no choice over who I saw, so I didn't.  I had a jerk.  He told me I would need a hysterectomy, but since I had 3 abdominal surgeries (gallbladder and female issues 2x) he would not do it.  I asked to be sent somewhere else for further help.  My sponsor told me to take charge of my health care like Patty always told us.  He sends me to my current doctors office.  I am now seeing a urogynecologist.  The entire staff has specialties with Women's Sexual Health.  It was exactly who I needed to be with.  It was that "good doctor" Patty told me to search for.  The crew there expects IC, but wants to make sure that I'm not having other issues also.  We set up surgery, bladder cam, and Physical therapy.  Turns out a lot of my pain was appendix, but there was no endo.  The bladder cam showed why I had a majority of the pain though.  I have IC.  

     IC is a chronic condition characterized by a combination of uncomfortable bladder pressure, bladder pain and sometimes pain in your pelvis, which can range from mild burning or discomfort to severe pain.  For those saying "oh a bad case of bladder infection" oh so not close.  If you have ever had a cold sore on your lip or inside of your mouth and have eaten something acidic, salty or anything of the sort and felt that pain you are just experiencing the beginning.  Imagine a bunch of little cuts/sores all over your bladder.  Then as your bladder fills with urine (acidic/spice/etc filled) it gets into all those little cuts/sores.  Imagine that pain.  It's not exactly the best feeling in the world.  So, imagine being told that you are going to have to deal with this with only a 50% chance of it clearing up eventually.  Yeah...super right....LOL.

     Well, I have decided that I'm not going to let that get me down.  I'm going to take my Elmiron as prescribed, and continue on with my daily life.  I'm not going to let the bad days overcome the good.  I've got 2 amazing kids I want to be out running around camping with.  I have a wonderful husband who I enjoy spending time fishing, shopping, gaming with.  I have a career with Pure Romance that I love.  I'm going to share my good, my bad, and my ok.  I hope to be an inspiration to look at the good not just the bad!!!  Again WELCOME.  Sorry this first post was so long.